2018 is suppose to be the year of great expectations, new beginnings and lots of extraordinary memories, or at least that is what I had anticipated. Yet, as I acknowledge that it is indeed the month of March, my heart is saddened by all of the time pain has infiltrated my body thus far, and still no human solution as to why. Part of me ask the question, Lord did I really do something so terribly wrong as I recanted the last few months of my life. Yet, the only response I can identify with simply confirms process is uncomfortable, especially when promotion is the reward. Tears begin to flow because faced at the crossroads of purpose and relief, I’m struggling. At this moment I am physically, mentally and emotionally defeated clinging desperately to His Promise that this is not the final chapter of my story. I have no clue as to how my story will evolve. Another level of faith I am trying to understand and embrace as I place one foot in front of the other. However, what I am discovering is healthy love from a community of people who continue to pray for me, encourage me and take care of me through this process has made me well aware that isolation has never been my friend. Through their various expressions of kindness, my strength to stay in the fight of the unknown with a sense of peace has been increased. Thank you all for caring when I had no words to express my uncertainty. #LURH
So to say that 2018 started out trying to demolish my faith is an understatement. Since New Year’s Eve my body has been attacked with sickness with such force that in the process if I am truly being authentic, it has tried to occupy a portion of my heart, soul and spirit where only my faith is intended to dwell. One week of sickness can be frustrating but after four weeks of sickness, I began to identify with the five key stages of the illness experience: (1) symptom experience; (2) assumption of the sick role; (3) medical care contact; (4) dependent patient role; and (5) recovery and rehabilitation. I also began to have some level of doubt in reference to the plans that God spoke over my life. I began to take inventory of the decisions I have made, no matter the decree of importance. The people I have allowed to influence my views, but most of all I questioned myself as to whether or not what God showed me was indeed for me. The current conditions kept trying to regurgitate my past; by continuously reminding me of the default me, the person I was prior to me allowing God to be my ruler and my guide. That little voice that quietly thwarts me as it echoes, “the abundant future that you are striding to achieve, is not attainable for people like you.” In moments like these, my decision to align with God’s vision for my life, my prayer life and those that God has assigned to me are vital! In this dim place, God’s truth must be the loudest voice I hear and believe. It’s in this position I must acknowledge my weakness and allow His strength to completely reside. My future outcome is in the balance. How do I trust His word which informs me that it is absolutely impossible to please Him without faith, when my faith is questionable? Choices, choices and more choices, I must indeed believe the revealed forecast that He has allowed me to taste and see that it is indeed good. I must develop the endurance to praise Him during the heavy situations to prove to Him that doubt will not be an effective disruption when it comes to His Plan for my life being completely manifested. After all, finished potential is working for me and through me, in spite of my messes. Is it difficult at times to stay true to the Plan, especially when being my own cheerleader is a required a role that I have yet to become proficient in or accustomed to? To raise the pompoms and recite cheers on my behalf seem irrelevant, until now. I discovered the best example during my isolation period. God did that for me at the cross. He became His own advocate to the Father. God knew exactly what I needed to hear, see and experience in order to continue with the process to achieve His Plan for my life. I have an unexplainable blessed life regardless of my messes, and some of them through man’s eyes were great, yet He stills see me valuable for His good works. #LURH
How many times in a single day do we choose preference, the power or opportunity of choosing, over, purpose, the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists? To add insult to injury, when uttering the words, “I prefer this..” do we truly comprehend how these choices have the potential to drive us away from destiny, the very reason why we exist?
Think about it for a minute, deep down inside you know exactly what it is that gives you passion. I may not necessarily know what that driving force is for you. It could be your loved ones and friends, work, social injustice or helping the homeless. However, what I do understand is when you engage in this driving force called passion it brings about positive emotions in both you and the environment you are meant to affect. I believe activities that have the power to create positive emotions are destiny related. Explore a little deeper and what you will discover is that a person’s life goals and values are influential factors for their passion.
Imagine all of your bills paid off and you still have a little something left in your bank account to survive for a minute. How would you invest your resources? Once you answer this question, ask yourself, why the hesitation for not aligning with destiny today. Don’t allow excuses like, I don’t have time, and I don’t have enough money control your thought process. Remember, you first must be able to manage a little, before more can be added to your life. Check out Luke 16:10, He who is faithful in a very little thing is also faithful in much.
We get so excited when we tell others what we prefer, as if we truly know what we prefer. In all honesty, what we really are conveying is that we like the way we feel when choosing blah blah blah. Because often times we are not even aware that our so called preferences takes us off the pathway of purpose. We become so consumed by our own preferences we forfeit great opportunities to exercise the power of free will to align with our Creator who has the best plan for our lives. #LURH.
As 2017 closes, I am amazed at the various projects I had envisioned being completed by the end of this year. Yet, more than several of my ideas and tasks continue to be idle in the phase one position, “in my head.” There has been no movement, from my head to my heart nor any visibility by others. In my many attempts to cultivate excuses to justify the lack of progress, I must accept real truth, which, if I dare to be transparent, God never sanctions non profitable requests. How do I know this? I never once bothered to ask if my desires were vital components or even if they are essential resources for my destiny to be achieved. As difficult as it is for me to admit, creating a vision for my 2017, there were somethings I didn’t necessarily seek direction from God for? After all, isn’t He really busy dealing with real issues LOL! This awakening has forced me into an unknown state, where I am now obligated to confront and re-evaluate my processes and procedures. Don’t let my foolish behavior be your downfall. If evidence is needed, let me be clear, lack of progress in certain areas is totally visible to those who know me and pay attention, in other words, growth can be seen. The red flags do indeed confirm that the grace and mercy needed to handle the responsibilities has not been granted for such undertakings yet, nor has the adequate power required been made available to me to accomplish the goals. As I dig a little deeper, what I have discovered is the importance of consulting the Creator regarding all segments of my life, the major and the minor so I may obtain understanding of my role and discipline to stay in my lane. I have used laughter as a deflection to prevent the tears from flowing for how much time I wasted, planning with expectations, rather than seeking Him for direction to truly make sure I am on the path He designed exclusively for me. I am reminded of this phrase, ““If you want to make God laugh, just tell Him your plans. Plans with no purpose can be equated to faith without works, dead and of no value! #LURH
As 2017 draws to a close, behind closed doors I begin the process of taking inventory of the investments of my time, my love, my talents, my money, in other words my life to see what has proven to be an asset and what I would consider a liability. I start off by simply reminiscing. Like most of us, my focus is directed towards the difficult and disappointing moments, mostly because, these are the areas where my most valuable lessons were learned. It is here, I am force to measure the condition of my heart and the level of my faith when life happens.
As I continue navigating through the various events, I place emphasis on my strengths and my weaknesses to gauge if visible growth has occurred. What I have discovered, my greatest struggle is my belief in God for my own abundant life, not in every area, just the ones that at times may require that I be unaided. Through my effortless actions, those internal conversations that creep up in my head to persuade me that this good thing can’t possible happen for me, exposes how I am contributing to the under minding of my future. No matter how well intent my motives, I have allowed circumstances to create distance between me fulfilling purpose. It baffles me at times, at the amount of time I have wasted, the person who is always willing to help create ladders of opportunities for others to reach their potential, I shake my head at truth. Yet, knowing, accepting and believing that God has put something great in me and for me, is surreal. As I attempt to muster up the same level of faith for myself as I share with those connected to me, I sigh and silently acknowledge that the struggle is indeed real. It’s almost funny the distractions the enemy will use to make you abort purpose.
Granted, it has taken years for me to totally comprehend this reality. As a result of my willingness to confront my fears, contamination can no longer affect my life. As I continue with the developmental process, understanding and doubt have found there relevant positions. I am no longer choosing to settle for safe, I am now pursuing with great expectations with the assurance of Philippians 1:6 6being confident of this, that He who began a good work in Lisa will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Not to mention, His word never returns void. #LURH
Flashes of my life after my recent 50th birthday made me more aware of the necessity of being true to my path. For far too long the conflicting strategy of “What Ifs” plagued my pre-fifty world LOL! I gave the “What Ifs” permission to reign, while simultaneously validating myself by believing “I’m being responsible by weighing the worst case probabilities.” In reality, my actions of entertaining the “What Ifs” is what it is, Lisa giving control to “FEAR” False Evidence Appearing Real rather than admitting I don’t really trust God 100% to give me the expected ending I desire most. By confronting the battles in my mind that frequently attempts to discourage me that God’s will for my life is unattainable, I now understand this is the pathway I must endure to achieve my anticipated ending. I have come to truly know and accept that the “What Ifs” of life are a waste of my time, a tactic that will never provide a profitable return on any investment. The “What Ifs” are mere “HYPE” obstacles that when unchecked threatens my faithfulness to my path leaving me in the position of jeopardizing all of God’s promises for me. I can’t do it! I must be faithful and trust that God is a promise keeper. He desires only the best life for me. Difficult life decisions do not negate this truth. I must voluntarily evict the “What Ifs!” Stay focus on the One that is able to do more than you or I could ever imagine. My anticipated ending is secured by my 100% commitment to trust in Him! #LURH
This week has ignited quite a commotion. It appears that the struggle of overall life has impacted many that one must truly remain focus in order to see God’s handiwork. My prayer life this week has taken on a wide range of references. From news of people suffering with unexplainable sickness, to others searching for understanding as to how to unwrap forgiveness in order to move forward, while incorporating those who continue in the fight to deny, dodge, or even defy depression. Yet, in spite of all of these variables, news of a promotion in salary from a friend, the outward demonstration of kindness shown by a stranger to a youth, the lessons from others that reveal great insight, and new beginnings for loved ones who thought it was not possible, thankfulness discovers a pathway to escape my heart through my voice. As stillness provides a sense of peace, God’s ability is so crystal clear. It brings such awareness as to how He uses negative and positive conditions to balance our daily lives as He cultivates the love within us. These quotes are so refreshing, “don’t judge a book by its cover” and “looks can be deceiving.” They confirm that one never truly comprehends the condition of a life, unless it’s your own. Therefore, we need not be too quick to tell the tale of another; after all you didn’t experience all of their pages. #LURH